dreams, batch 2

1. John Lennon was getting posthumously convicted from some crime or another (I believe sex crimes) and my dads friend sent me a change.org petition by some people who wanted to get his sentence moved to Paul McCartney so Paul McCartney would complete Lennon’s sentence in “online virtual jail” (which I think just meant he just had to be on Zoom all the time). So my dad’s friend is like we have to stop this. So I go to the meeting to decide whether it’ll happen and in there is none other than Elon Musk. I take the next 2 hours to be rude to him to his face.

- A.D.P.

2. Someone was eating a crawfish off my belly and it burrowed into my middle. But it didn’t hurt it tickled. And Tilda Swinton was there but she was a doula. And so was this boy Gerald who went to my primary school but we were on Houseparty. We were all giggling? I think I gave birth. And we were in Sweden. Distinctly Sweden.

- O.K.I.

3. I was eight and my parents’ funeral happened in a Dunkin’ Donuts (address: 130 Kinderkamack Rd, Emerson NJ, 07630).

- T.L.N.

4. it was halloween and my friends and were invited to a halloween party at my high school math teacher’s house but it was awkward so we went to a megachurch and there was a live band that played my top song of 2024 june hymn by the decemberists which enthralled me such that i almost converted to christianity but then i got in a fight with an old man and left

- N.A.Z.